mmMmMs

2006-12-16T22:57:00.000-08:00

Happy 19th darling.

i love you. (:

& i hope its enough.

2006-12-15T05:46:00.000-08:00

today's the start of the 5th.
and tmr's someone's 19th.
he says im his number one.
i certainly hope its true.

BONDING DAY
with the girls + chicken - yx.
DEJA VU WAS AWESOME !
mwaha. so was window shopping. and lunch !
its been awhile !

went for orthodontic appointment.
green and red braces !
and they hurt so much.
arghhhhhh.

and went shopping with mummy dearest.
2 belts and a pretty dress.
fully sponsored yo'.
LOL
ahhhhhhh happy day.

a little flaw : biz stats was the shits.

2006-12-12T03:09:00.000-08:00

an entire day spent with miss mark lim !
(:
studying in the morning
lunch
studying again
shopping
my place
library
simple yet sweet- i love.

http://www.myheritage.com

2006-12-11T09:09:00.000-08:00

spent the whole lousy day making a scrap book
which i feel like throwing away now

you sound as if im retarded.

2006-12-09T04:55:00.000-08:00

American-styled dinner at Aunt Veron ans Uncle Bradley's was loveee.
Their house - typical American family, cosy.com !
& they're the most loving married couple i know.
*
**
***
Didn't you say that if there was a problem we would work it out?
I remember you did.
So why.
***
**
*
oh well. its not like you read my blog anymore anyway.

When you just get together with someone.
They treat you as if ur the only thing they ever need.
As time passes,
It may not be that way.
(:
Sad thing, relationships.

2006-12-04T04:28:00.000-08:00

firstly.
i know certain people do read my blog and its not hard to figure out why you can.
yeahh the password prompt aint foolproof and probably 98.967% of the people know their way around that script.
but hello? its put there for a reason.
if you wanna read you shld have the goddamned courtesy to ask.
you don go snooping around through such means just to find out how things are between me and that someone else.
why do you even care?
guess its some kinda gossipy-topic among you people or some cheap thrill but its someone else's frustrations, not some big joke.
you all think whoa she threw herself at ____ .
& seriously, all you people are anticipating is when i finally blog an entry that says:
ITS OVER.

ohhh its rather simple. why not you keep up with your lousy comments and spread them around for no rhyme or reason. you'd get your wish then.

2006-12-02T00:48:00.000-08:00

updates!

i completely forgot abt dinner at Morton's last sat.
it was the best !
but maybe not worth 300 bucks.
pffft.
& the 2nd visit doesnt seem as classy as the first.

yesterday.
was jam and hop. teehee.
before that, town with jiahui and laura.
kinda awkward at first, but it got better later !
then mark came down, not-so-good stuff happened.
den it took a turn for the better again.
dinner at taka basement, just the 4 of us.
after that, jam and hop with jh and laura !
funny that we're only a trio while others go in packs.
we made up for the lack of numbers with the fun i guess?
cos it was damnnn fun, and tiring.
lingyu was a shocker ! she can dance real well. OMG.
(:
jiahui like ive alr seen before was damnn high, thats my diaper grandma ! i still love you that much !
and and and hot babe laura , she was amazinggggg.

overall? i had fun.

2006-11-28T07:04:00.000-08:00

edit : picture deleted.
before my editor trial runs out in 1 day.
(:

2006-11-28T05:03:00.000-08:00

:)
i guess its commendable that you still had time for me today despite your busy schedule.
but just so you know,
it was never about the money
nor what you could buy me
its all about you.

sometimes when you have all the money in the world ,
you'll realise all you have left beside you ,
is someone who wants a share of that money .

but even if you were broke.
i'd still be here.
with you.

on another note:

coincidentally, aaron seah was at aljunied ! LOL.
someone was broke so i treated bubble tea.
he's damnnnn retarded man.
was in the library,
talking on scraps of paper
and i have like marker lines all over my arm.
WTH !
but thanks for walking me home.

2006-11-24T07:02:00.000-08:00

town with aaron and his siblings today. teehee. fun ! especially when the projector broke down halfway through the movie. and being called xiao long nu like a million times. free lunch. mwaha. what a day.
turns out ling yu knows him too. small world man. pffft.
xxhaojiemeixx is a jinx !

weird messages on friendster. just one example perhaps?

Date:
localDateTimewithTimezone("11/23/2006 7:33 AM","timetag1","SG");
Thursday, 23 November, 2006 11:33 PM
Subject:
hey care ot chat mah???
Message:
Hiya..can be know you mah? Zhan hong here, age 22 stay in the east area…bedok.. Last time I was studying in Tp and b4 that was St Hilda Currently was in army taking care of doggy…close to 2 yrs of washing dog shit le…I have just ord not long ago..lol.. I m the only child also.. my hobbies are cycling, movie, shopping,, jogging, online chat, anime, game console..

weird guys on the streets.
STFU ? kthx

mark lim ! don say i nvr blog abt you huh.
someone's taken a turn to the cute-sy side recently. esp the random calls, intentionally kiddish voice and words like " okayy wo ting ni de lo", "if still don have, den i'll be v sad, den i'll cry, den i'll fly to your arms".
& that someone sent me home while on crutches.
yes i feel loved.
(:

2006-11-21T05:57:00.000-08:00

i hate it when she always writes testimonials above mine. seriously once or twice could be a coincidence. but like almost every time? its upsetting. =[

2006-11-19T06:10:00.000-08:00

someone once told me
some things can never be replaced.

like 175 maybe?
my heart still skips a beat.

or my xxhaojiemeixx?
still one of my best confidantes.

the only two worth remembering anyways.
=]

2006-11-18T06:04:00.000-08:00

online shopping.
saw 3 things i wanna get from Guess?
but thats gotta wait.

saw a cross necklace too.
but i guess it'll come to 100 odd dollars.
thank god Roland has an account
so at least i can get it.
teehee.

2006-11-18T04:06:00.000-08:00

today's like any other day.
lousy and boring.
major giddiness again. pffft. how irritating.

mum says tradition's hiring a female trainee broker.
hell yeah im interested.
she says i can stop school actually.

idk.

2006-11-17T07:04:00.000-08:00

the other girls.
i wish they'd get a clue and stop throwing themselves at him.

girls.
they enjoy throwing themselves at guys who're attached.
to see if they're better den their girlfriends.
& maybe hope that they can prove their importance in that guy's life.

seriously.
get yourselves some other single desperate fleabags.
this guy's mine.
not yours
not hers
not ever
and thats not abt to change for a long time to come.
whether you like it or not.

2006-11-16T03:01:00.000-08:00

mmms. today's a day after the 4th m.
someone hinted very badly of the need to blog abt it. hahahahah ! so here goes.
for a day that didnt start off all that good, it took a turn for the better. =] dinner at Ma Maison was oh-so-good. and the drinks after at TCC made it even better. mwaha. yes yes and pictures too ! but someone has yet to send me. oh wells.

& the best part? someone swore today to never walk out on me. hahahahha. im glad sometimes that whenever things go wrong. at the end of the day, it all ends up well. and yeah. that same someone promised to walk through all the bad and tough times with me but asked if i will too. my answer? hell yeah i will ! (:

hahahha. did i mention i pushed someone around on a wheelchair todayy. LOL !

2006-11-11T06:10:00.000-08:00

you know it when.
you hardly get any messages anymore.

thx lingyu darling for the company whilst getting e braces put on. =]

2006-11-10T03:47:00.000-08:00

yeahh. whichever you prefer.

clearly,
it was me watching as you walked out on me.
'nuff said.

i thought you said never to walk out on you.
look who's doing it now.

sigh.

2006-11-07T06:19:00.000-08:00

If one day u feel like crying,
call me.
I dont promise that i will make u laugh,
but i can cry with u.
If one day u want to run away,
dont be afraid to call me.
I dont promise to ask u to stop,
but i can run with u.
If one day u dont want to listen to anyone,
call me.
I promise to be there for u,
but also promise to remain quiet.
But one day if u call,
and there is no answer,
come fast to see me.
Perhaps i need u.

Teehee. K i ripped it off friendster. but its meaningful i guess? mmms.

Dad's constantly scolding me about dieting. as usual, and just did.
Apparently he thinks im skinny.
But hell no, im not that skinny.
Pfft.

2006-11-04T08:34:00.000-08:00

sylvia showed me this site. and this ring screams gorgeous- at least to me it does.

teehee.

2006-11-03T23:44:00.000-08:00

teehee. fireworks. =]

2006-11-03T03:06:00.000-08:00

gimme a reason to stay.

the extraction hurt like a bitch. pffft. and it hasnt stopped bleeding since 3.
*(&#*!!*@&#(#

2006-11-01T07:20:00.000-08:00

i still cry myself to sleep at night.

2006-10-30T01:59:00.000-08:00

idk why there has to be a reason for everything. you'd have to have a really good reason to say hi on msn, to send an sms, or to make a call. cant it just be that we felt like doing it or that we want to? everything's become more of a need to cos of bla bla bla rather that want to cos you care. weird huh.

alright. im like talking abt weird stuff but they do make sense. pffft.

2006-10-30T01:35:00.000-08:00

mmms. watched a show today and came across this phrase.

All that aint yours, glitter as gold.
All that is, worthless as stone.

alright, so its just another phrase. but hey it means more than that. pffft. its just so darn true how something thats not yours could seem so perfect and so fine. yet, when you attain it, it doesnt seem any different from any other junk lying around. just like how they say the grass is greener on the other side. you'd never appreciate what you have. all you think of is. ITS LACKING SOMETHING. IT HAS THIS AND THAT I DONT LIKE. we never really stop for a moment to say. theres something about it that makes it beautiful. its always abt the bad, its never about appreciation.

likewise for people unfortunately. and its sad, really. like you could do so much for a friend - sacrifices, commitment and all that. in the end, they only remember one thing - how you let them down. superficial people, humans. not to say im not human. but yeah, you get the drift.

its like. how do you expect others to be this and that when firstly, you arent even close to perfection. and the focus placed on a single flaw is more than enough to neglect and miss out on all the good. and it feels worse that a single mistake makes all your other efforts worthless. if you try to make up for that flaw? 100 positive attributes arent even enough. how sad is that. not to others maybe. but definitely so to me.

went to suntec with hazel yx and joyce. talking to them really helped and i feel so so so so relieved. =] joyce was working though. but we got free caramel fraps and smth else. teehee. =]

2006-10-28T04:04:00.000-07:00

baby i know the story
i ve seen the picture
it s written all over your face
tell me what s the secret
that you've been hiding
and who s gonna take my place

i should ve seen it comin
i should ve read the signs
anyway i guess it s over
can t believe that i m the fool again

i thought this love would never end
how was i to know
you never told me
can t believe that i m the fool again
and i who thought you were my friend

how was i to know you never told me
baby you should ve called me
when you were lonely
when you needed me to be there
sadly you never gave me
too many chances
to show you how much i care

how was i to know you never told me
about the pain and the tears
if i could i would
turn back the time

this song is rad pls . heard it just now. and im loving it. its old but whatever. says alot. i feel for it. =]

mms. im getting braces. lalala. geek looks are love . the bands in my mouth hurt. on a better note, mummy brought me on some kinda chocolate tasting spree. it was awesommme . with ice cream and all. and even pepper lunch. i love pls. she even sponsored shoe-shopping. love love love. =]

i changed my friendster profile. it shld please EVERYONE [ and thats oh-so-true]. hahahahahahha. =D its been a long long week. & im glad its almost over and for those who made it all better. aaron kevin lingyu and weini ! everyones been so sweet. esp someone for volunteering to meet me when i was upset. plus talking and all. it made me feel a gazillion loads better. sometimes idk what i'd do if i didnt have a friend like you. thanks ! =]

2006-10-26T04:05:00.000-07:00

change is good i guess.

=]

yuan yi shou hu yi ge ren dai biao xi huan ta ma?
sounds cheena. LOL. but its like the coolest line ive heard.

goals?
- be nice
- not be a loser
- good GPA
- and smth else.

2006-10-25T07:53:00.000-07:00

ALVES IS A SELFISH KID. HE HOGS THE COM AND DOESNT LET MY XXHAOJIEMEIXX USE IT.

now im alone and miserable.
and i have no one to complain to.
all Alves' fault.

life's beautiful isn't it. it has an uncanny ability to start off well and end off shitty every single mtr.fck.in day. i'll sum it all up in 4 words:

SAME SHIT DIFFERENT DAY.

i hate everyday. everyday is god damn chore. i always end up feeling miserable. i have issues - i know.

someone turn back time and bring me back to preschool. the other times were horrid.

2006-10-24T05:35:00.000-07:00

xxhaojiemeixx !!! we need to talk ! =]
i look like an ah lian. typical. who gives a flying fcuk.

& as a sweet song of solitude played in the background, it felt as if her soul was lifted up and fading away - far far away.

that feeling was to be continued, as she was left alone and tormented until the day she'd be one with the dirt on the ground - the dirt that buried it all.

2006-10-23T06:11:00.000-07:00

its not like im unaffected
its not like i have no feelings
its not like im not trying
its not like im not hurt

&

sometimes at the end of it all, you dont know whats right or wrong anymore.

you try -

and maybe it just isnt enough for anyone .

they still laugh, they still despise, maybe thats when you know you just arent that important after all.

random entry. =]

2006-10-17T06:38:00.000-07:00

ferrero gardens. =] most heavenly chocs to date - i love. mwahas.

2006-10-14T00:53:00.000-07:00

teehee. brought breakfast to someone with broken LEGS and the same someone sent me all the way to the mrt station while on crutches. very touched pls ! and went shopping with apple before work. work was a bore. and i made cookies today ! yay-ness. LOL

last week's shortbread cookies.

this week's cornflakes cookies with marshmallows.

darling ! get well soon. =]

2006-10-11T07:22:00.000-07:00

met up with beatrice, then jh yesterday. miss hanging out with them quite abit. =]
& i saw this gorgeous Guess? long wallet. the same kinda material as my other Guess? wallet. only that its long and white and has a diff buckle. gorgeous pls. OMG ! it was calling out my name. LOL! be mine? hahahhaha

2006-10-09T05:44:00.000-07:00

FUCK. yesterday my hair was long and now its friggin short. i hate it. i wanna cut it all off. =[

&& i can tell someone's damn disappointed that i went to cut it for no reason. sorry i don look good enough for you. =[

2006-10-04T04:54:00.000-07:00

tsk. a few ppl said i sound diff. my voice broke la. im a man now. LOL. manly man. =]]]

& after so much hype on wanting to go to korea, my parents backed out in the end cos its gonna be real cold this year [ possibly -14 or smth] and we wont be having much fun in that case. 2nd option was japan. and it was almost a done deal kinda trip but we din get to go. why? cos it was fully booked. =[ and the only days that we wanted for departure weren't available. quite disappointing though, the itinerary seemed really nice. we're gonna go there next june or smth. this yr, we're gg to shanghai. hahahaha. havent been there but i guess it could be fun. =] fingers double-crossed. mmms.

chalet yest was fun. hahahah. esp playing dai dee with kevin alvin and miss mark. and i loved getting hit on my butt by joyce and her cola bottle. it hella hurt alot. zzz. new revelation : johnny walker or however you spell it tastes like the plastic-ky thingie when you blow balloons. GROSS. ever so weird picture with / of the others soon !!!

&& someone sweet woke up at 6+ to send me to work today.
love love !

2006-09-30T00:30:00.000-07:00

well, it isnt easy for me either.

2006-09-22T07:55:00.000-07:00

a special entry to my dear lil boy:

for being ever so patient, tolerant and forgiving no matter the circumstance and a fine example of actions speaking louder than words cos what you've done is solid proof of all that you've told me - the promises, the assurances, name it all.

its been a little over 2 months now and things are looking rather well and i do hope that they'll be even better in the days to come, spent together with you. =] and you said i must have felt it wasnt worth much being with someone who would be gone but you have my assurance that i dont feel so, never will im very sure ! and i don wanna think of the negative aspects of the near future cos im pretty sure it aint gonna happen. everythings gonna be alright. know why? cos like u always said we'll go through it together. nothings gonna be impossible. so bear with it a lil while longer and we'll get there. dont you think?

and in the meantime i'll be here for you as long as you want me to, giving you support and cheering you on. i dont give a damn abt jealous lil girls or assholes that have no comprehension of your situation but still dare to open their damned mouths to criticise. they ought to be ashamed of themselves. i love you my dear. and if you ask if i still will after today or tomorrow or the day after

i'd tell you: forever and ever, babe.

2006-09-21T08:23:00.000-07:00

past few days were a living nightmare. major aching and non-stop puking. got a jab though and still sleeping 20 hrs a day. =[ i miss everyone !

2006-09-17T08:06:00.000-07:00

a million things on my mind - no one to share them with. somehow whatever i say to one person alone ends up being broadcast to a few others. that sucks pretty much. sick and tired of being sick and tired. catch my drift? doubt you do.

grandma's not well. hope things will turn around. cos she's real important and i wouldnt exchange her for the world. she can have my leg. =]

i miss the days when it was just the four of us. with carl brigitte and bryant. rmb how we said that we will still be friends despite us all gg away. bryant left for canada, carl's still here but leaving for australia, brigitte's barely an acquaintance right now. i really had fun then. wish i could relive those years eh. and now i understand what xxhaojiemeixx feels to be friendless. i'll be your friend ! we havent talked in days.

and the lil special one. you'd better be strong and get well cos only you can help yourself. & you promised to never ever go away so dont start backing out on your promises cos i'd hate for that to happen. and i'll loathe you for leaving - childish but true. i'd rather you lose your memory and forget abt every darn thing den to ______.

mum offered me money to tutor my bro.. its easy money provided he even wants to study. i spend like hours trying to get him to study and in the end, he doesnt. to make things worse, he even lost my books. retarded.

ritz is fine, mainly cos i have apple for company. she's the sweetest. =] always willing to change shifts juz to accompany me. teehee.

2006-09-12T08:51:00.000-07:00

was at the esplanade today and there was this gang of lians and bengs [ in the usual bunch of 10-20 ppl] which was a turnoff really. they kept trying to see what we were doing and werent discrete about it. disgusting. and when we walked past on the way out they kept turning ard to look at us and made funny noises and weird comments in chinese which i dont understand at all. some lians and bengs jargon.. definitely not smth i wanna know. like EWWW ! mms. the only reason why they have the guts to open the thing on their ugly faces called a mouth is cos they were in a big group and obviously no one in the right mind would retaliate. the bottom line is they are just a buncha cowards with like futures being wasted away. too bad for them. HA !

someone's starting SIP tmr.. and i know we wont get to meet up as often now but i do hope that it wont cause us to drift apart cos i'd hate for that to happen. and time really flies and those who thought we wouldn't make it past 2 weeks together are dead wrong. cos here we are, nearing 2 months and with more to come, about to prove you wrong - big time.

2006-09-08T07:15:00.000-07:00

and when i left they were like:

a: eh so poor thing why you alone?
b: yeah lo so poor thing ur bf lei?
a: ya why mark not with you?
and theres more where that came from.

i was this close to answering dont know dont care.

and Lingyu was really sweet to listen to the shit i had to say till like almost 5 in the morning. and to offer to send me home juz now. much love !

2006-09-04T06:39:00.000-07:00

it still is clear for everyone to see.
not that i should care.

but.
on a happier note:

i found this quote on the net but it didnt say where it came from.

As we grow up,
we learn that even the one person
that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will.
You will have your heart broken probably more than once
and it's harder every time.
You'll break hearts too,
so remember how it felt when yours was broken.
You'll fight with your best friend.
You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.
You'll cry because time is passing too fast,
and you'll eventually lose someone you love.
So take too many pictures,
laugh too much,
and love like you've never been hurt
because every sixty seconds you spend upset
is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

its friggin true isnt it? =[

and
im glad to have someone who :
%% is always there for me no matter what
%% tries juz to spend a lil more time with me
%% doesnt mind travelling so long and so far juz to meet for a lil while
%% is willing to put up with my unreasonable tantrum- throwing [ like yesterday]
&& actually does smth to help me with problems and not juz give empty talk and promises
%% wakes up super duper early to prepare breakfast or to send me to school
%% does the retard-est things just to cheer me up
%% understands
%% does the sweetest things
&& gives 110%
the list could go on forever.

&
i do appreciate it all and would gladly do the same and more.
just in case you're reading,
you're loved !
for real.

2006-08-30T10:37:00.000-07:00

it was clear for everyone to see.

mms.

i surrender.

thanks mister aaron goh for being the first lil person to call me at midnight. LOL. greatly appreciated pls. =]

2006-08-16T06:50:00.000-07:00

i loathe ghastly pictures - they freak me out bad . sounds like im making a big fuss outta pathetic images but they do remind me of how i was possessed and all as a kid.. and all those "visits" in my room.. not to mention the accident. it sucks really..

im sorry i rejected all those phone calls cos i really wasnt up for talking but thanks for calling anywayss. =] i guess more often than not i appear to be totally spaced and in a world of my own but really, nothing is wrong. sometimes i juz need time alone but underneath it all, i do feel extremely blessed - both friends and you you you [ =D ].

2006-08-14T09:06:00.000-07:00

YAYYYY .. talked to sylvia today like after a gazillion years.. i miss her so so so so much ! and she had my name in her nick so sweet ahhh ! so i did the same for her and it said " sylvia sylvia sylvia !" teehee.. i miss my patrol.. =[ it was so much fun then.. oh wells ! i had so much for talkign to herrr ! loves

2006-08-12T09:02:00.000-07:00

mmms . i never had a thing for fireworks - until today. teehee . it was gawgeousss . and so was the company... quite gay and all but not bad ahh . LOL !

&& i managed to study todayy. like finally - i touched my books ! thats all folks. bye bye bye bye .

2006-08-09T06:36:00.000-07:00

been sick lately.. =[ spending like donkey hours sleeping my life away.. its funny how 16 hours go by when ur sleeping. oh wells. juz wanna say a big big thank you to all e lil get- well msges and calls from everyone.. its greatly appreciated ! loves loves . also those that came down to accompany me as well as someone [ hints . ] who like set aside everyting to accompany me to the doctor and all. =] that makes me a happily sick girl . HAHAHAH . sounds wrong but wth who cares . summative test tmr.. im gonna like study it now.. damn tired pls. dinner for greatt ! i love . and so was the rest of the dayy. simple but nice.. teehee.

its funny how we have never-ending expectations and searches to attain so-called happiness and joy.. its nothing but being insatiable really. we keep wanting more and rarely stop to think of what we have at present. our projected vision to the future blurrs us from what we have right in front of us. its sad. and i do hope i wont be like that. i wanna be able to say " im leaving with no regrets" on my dying day . =]

2006-08-02T05:52:00.000-07:00

and so it makes you happy to see me miserable .
im glad you feel that way.
the simplest things i do results in hatred on your part.
and so you say whatever im enjoying now, i'll get it back worse in the future.
in what way do you even see me enjoying?
you dont know no nothing.
so Stfu.

i need a break .
everything feels fcuking fucked up right now.
i think i have issues for being perpetually upset.
guess what . you made me bitter .

thanks for nothing .

2006-07-31T06:18:00.000-07:00

Gawgeous; says:idk why she keep commenting on me
Gawgeous; says:like fucking out loud
Gawgeous; says:like piss off
Gawgeous; says:and get a brain

hahahah ! i absofrigginlutely loathe that slut . i din do shit to begin with. spoils my day. im gonna like skip lecture again tmr cos i don wanna see her ugly face. =]

other then that, the weekend was nice ! which reminds me, im gonna update the wishlist ! hahahahah.

mister aaron tells me of a "disneyland of sweets" called candy empire. i wanna go pretty please ! =] hahahhaah

2006-07-29T02:20:00.000-07:00

mwaha . my way of saying i dont want anyone else - thank you very much . someone doesnt believe me. how sad.

oh well
=[

random pic at kbox ! happy bday hazel - the most retarded girl everrr . and yet we all still love her. rather sad actually.

today! i could have friggin gone to watch the ndp preview or whatever its called but i had like a splitting headache and i couldnt be bothered to go. oh well. not too keen on fireworks anyway. hahahah ! i had and still am having an incredibly boring day. & bryan's having a rough day. sorry i couldnt accompany him and all but am hoping his crush would do smth to make him feel better.. and maybe even start showing him some concern. =]

2006-07-27T03:39:00.000-07:00

its hazel's 17th today ! we're gonna celebrate for her tmr.. teehee. hope she'll like everything.. other then that, things have been sucky lately. aaron goh ! where have you been ?! i miss my 2am entertainment. have clarisse den don wan me alr eh . tsk tsk. =[

sometimes its hard to live up to everyone's expectations
you get sick of trying and you do give up
no one really knows
cos theres so much you wanna say but cant
and even if you do
no one really does listen
you have so many things you wanna do
and so much u longed to achieve
but in the end
the confidence fades and there you go again
back to square one
things are just so wrong
guess u liked the superficiality of what you saw
but really, it never was that way
none of that really existed to begin with
im sorry if im disappointing
or that i'll nvr make you proud -
any of you to be exact
maybe
im just not good enough
im gonna take a step back now
catch me if i fall
will you?

2006-07-21T07:21:00.000-07:00

aaron goh - i dont care if you tell me that i defame you ! LOL. say what got clarisse but still need me cos we jie mei den when she called where you go huh huh huh ! some ppl not shy. tsk ! but since its aaron, its okay - he's not human . =]

and mark wants a quote dedicated to him . so he shall get one which i learnt from alvin ! teehee:

Ths rain makes all things beautiful,
The grass and trees too.
If the rain makes all things beautiful,
Why doesn't it rain on you?

anticipated problem: *mark: suannnnnnnnnn !*
x) KIDDING . CHILL !

hahahaha. watched hoodwinked today with hazel, matthew, jon, alvin and jeff. its sucha ridiculous movie but damn nice lahhh.. laughed throughout. LOL. the highlight however was when hazel and i went to body shop and she tried this sample face powder in a form of a ball. like each one is supposed to take one and she like squashed A FEW . after that she smeered one on her arm which was ghastly pink and glittery, which she spread onto her other arm as well before pretending to show me concern & sharing her wonderful gift with me. how very sweet... =] LOL !

2006-07-16T05:37:00.000-07:00

I spend each day here waiting for a miracle. and baby when you walked into my life I knew I didnt have to wait anymore. ♥

There's a love that only you can givea smile that only your lips can showa twinkle that can only be seen in your eyesand a life of mine that only you can complete.♥

2006-07-12T05:49:00.000-07:00

today, im gonna blog abt my gummy bears ! u now like gummy bears are supposed to be colourful and all cos they're like meant for lil kids? i bought one pack today and e lil individual packs inside are like DAMN UGLY LAH.. theres one red gummy, one orange gummy, and the other 6 are yellow.. like HELLO ! how proportionate.. LOL. oh yeahh.. and i went seoul garden today toos , where the password to the blog was constantly being quoted by some lil gay boy who like ALWAYS dirty his clothes, typical rich kids! its been like after like sucha long while since i ate there & i rmb that aaron goh promised to treat me to SG but till now, also haven . sheeshhhhhhh =D btw btw, Alvin is damn damn emo ! =) look at his nick todayyy :
Alvin- from me to you ; with love
personal msg: blow the wind and make me serene

LOL, apparently, i made him do that ! hahha . the original poem !
Fly up to heaven and fetch me a tune let loose your wings and heal my wounds send a bird to set me free blow the wind and make me serene say a prayer to end my fears don't abandon the trail of my tears open the skies to accept my cries forget the ocean emerge in my eyes

i rmb like a few days ago where we had this XIAO-craze . sparked off by tzehan [ <3 xiaohanz ] and followed by hazel [ <3 xiaojiez ], yx [ <3 xiaoxuanz ], me [ <3 xiaominz ] and later on after much persuasion alvin [ <3 xiaorongz ] - who wanted to be da rong at first ! hahahaha .

&& tze han and alvin were plain retarded today. i award them the title of master jedi of bullshit ! teehee. they were like all high over some stupid conversation abt their "hse" and how friggin rich they were - damn funny la pls. for eg . alvin said, " eh u know the sashimi right, we zhi jie jump inside our olympic size swimming pool and bite" and tzehan said, " yeah i open one window ah, i must take MRT ah !" it sounds rather random but when they were having this lil conversation, it was like quite well joint hahha.. and it lasted for a solid 20 mins. with the grand finale when tze han tried to teleport. DAMN DAMN HILARIOUS .

2006-07-07T08:06:00.000-07:00

whoa ! damn long since i last blogged. mwaha ! someone complained that its inactive so i shld blog today ! mmms.. YX IS DOWN WITH CHICKEN POX and hasnt been in school since last thurs.. its super saddening pls ! hahaha.. we got her flowers and super irrelevant cards :

hahaha ! and we sprang a surprise visit.. like so super sweet of us eh ! mmms.. wad else happened in the week was an oral presentation yesterday and today.. we were like all freaked out and nervous.. lucky for us MISS TIRZAH'S REPLACED by a friggin cool teacher called DEVIN.. =D so it was quite a breeze ! and i guess lessons would be fun for the next few weeks ! yay on that.. nth much happened other than that.. oh abt HAZEL ! i asked her to lend me her fone during POM lecture and she stretched forward to the chair in front to reach for it and she made some funny noise.. and everyone [ well almost, which is bad enough] turned to look at her.. including the lecturer pls ! and she turned to face me with an annoyed look on her extremely comical face, saying smth like :: eh next time dont make such noise la ! and guess wad.. those who turned ard thought it was me ! wth la.. NICE ONE HAZEL... lol ! den wen we were leaving the LT, GGB smiled at her and she smiled back.. den she tripped on the stairs like immediately, almost dragging me down ! LOL and she was like WHOAAAAAAAAAAAAA ! i could have died laughing.. hazel is super super retarded ! [in a gd way] and thats why she rocks.. =] joyce on the other hand has been having numerous affairs with whom i shall not name ! hahaha.. and for example theres a phrase such as "aunt agony".. she'll convert it to "aunt your head agony".. she's been at it for days and has started to act cute ever since yx din come to school.. its damn OMG LA !

2006-06-21T04:44:00.000-07:00

finally im back home.. mwaha ! recount of wad happened?? on mondayy ::
met aaron at town for a movie [she's the man] which was damnnn hilarious la ! && lunch at pepper lunch, which i din finish though it was super duper nice. mwaha ! after that met mark & went to e night safari where i friggin did a split on the floor due to unforeseen circumstances.. LOL ! and yes in return i got new scars.. yay! =D denn met up with the others - affandi, alvin, weini, joyce, hazel, kevin at downtown east where we juz hung out for quite a while before going to the beach.. and as usual, we bought alcohol.. hahahaha ! rather dumb though.. after playing numerous rounds of blackjack, we left for DTE again.. ate cup noodles at cheers and bitched abt others [ its a daily routine ].. mmms.. den we left for kevin's hse at ard 5.. and we all slept in the living room.. hahahah ! damn unconfortable lahhhhh !
tuesday::
officialy begun when we woke up at 1PM ! hahaha.. took a cab down to weini's place where we met up with YX to help carry stuff.. den took yet another cab to DTE-again . after checking into the chalet, we went to pizza hut for lunch.. which was superbbb ! mwaha.. andd uhh after that went back in where we juz hung out before weini's friends came.. we had these neighbours that were damn noisy ! so hazel started to shout GOALLLLLLLLLLL ! at the top of her lungs and a few others did the same.. come to think of it.. its DAMN HILARIOUS ! hhahhaha.. they rock la..the bbq started and at ard 6-7ish, andrew and jonathan came.. den they started to mix drinks [meaning alcohol] and like in 2 hrs a few of them were already drunk.. i highly recommend spending time with drunkards cos they really act like retards.. LOL ! and it was damn funny.. hahaha.. other den the fact that they're rather violent and enjoy running out of the room to like wherever.. oh and there are loadsa videos of them dancing ! hahahaha this entry sounds boring.. but w/e =D

they say all u get from love is a love song ; i think otherwise

2006-06-15T10:27:00.000-07:00

HELLO TO ALL THE SUNBURNT PPL ! mwaha . ytd's combined class thingie at sentosa was pretty fun.. hahahha.. highlights? I GOT THROWN INTO THE WATER 5 TIMES BY JOYCE ! zzzzzzzzz.. and the salt water kept irritating my eyes.. wtf ! hahaha.. din do much actually.. had breakfast at cheers before we went to sentosa.. and when we were there we played dog and bone, captain's ball, volley ball and juz swam ard in the water.. LOL.. cant recall the gazillion no. of times i screamed.. and im damnnn sunburnt ! dang.. my skin's peeling ! im too lazy to type abt everything that happened so i'll let the pictures do the story telling.. some picts look rather wrong.. but w/e .. loves !
and now for the bitching : this, i can type all day long ! i friggin hate it when im the backup plan of you ppl when u become needy [ for company ] and when a better plan comes along den oh i cant meet you when you ppl asked me out to begin with.. whatever . next would be disgusting ppl who dont have a clue and keep sucking up to ppl they juz met and betray the friends they already have in order to achieve their dirty low scumbag aims... you ppl probably need mirrors in case you dont already have one.. but then again.. why bother? your uglyness would break the mirror into a trizillion pieces anyways.. so do yourselves a lil favour and remain in your own lil paths and not wander off trying to fit in elsewhere.. you'll try? oh no, dont bother ! cos you fcuking hell wont . teehee . LASTLY ! lets say i have a friend who has a bf called BURGER KING [pardon the random name] and she take pictures with unique poses with it and posts it on friendster. a month later, a certain junior of mine finds a bf called BURGER KING as well and takes pictures of herself in the exact same poses.. the difference would be? my friend looks great while the junior is a typical sad-ass ah lian trying to be cool and would die trying.. and she doesnt even look nice and tyyppes lyyk diis worhss.. also, my friend uses photoshop while the junior uses paint to type in words.. like LOL.. whatever ! if you dont like how i bitch abt the whole world den too bad no one asked you to come in here anyway .

2006-06-11T08:28:00.000-07:00

ever felt like ur losing ur grip on everything that's revolving around? that whatever you do and wherever you are, you're out of place? that your drowning in your own misery and almost every other smile on your face is just another facade? well join the club . why do i hate almost every fucking thing? cos life rocks thats why . whatever !

everybody needs somebody and i? - need you . =[ fuck it .

2006-06-10T05:39:00.000-07:00

mms.. shall blog abt yesterdayy & today . yest met mister aaron goh in the morn cos he was nice enough to accompany me.. x) so was at parkway from 10 till 3 plus.. rather fun.. I LOVED THAT HAMSTER ! x) its gawgeous. hehs... oh yeah i got slapped by someone.. which did hurt ! so pls feel guilty GOH HONG JUN AARON.. hahaahha.. whom also spoilt my voodoo doll ! arghhhs.. later on went to meet weini.. wad ard the aljunied area & later went to her place.. which i stayed at till 9pm.. ovverall my day was quite nice.. wad made it awesome was the opening world cup match between Germany and Costa Rica.. loves ! and as for todayy went to parkway and did loadsa grocery shopping & bought loadsa nice foodstuff.. and jolly shandy.. mmmms ! cooked diinner which i havent done in a gazillion years.. now im waiting for the match between England and Paraguay.. for now - ta darlings .

2006-06-08T07:48:00.000-07:00

finally - end of the midsems.. x) thats a huge huge relief.. hahahah.. today was csa.. preparation for it was the sucks . LOL ! its like totally pointless but i decided to study cos i don wanna fail anything juz yet and cos the teacher's real nice ! but seriously, who gies a flying fuck on how many characters a printer can print in a minute? && was planning on leaving the LT upon reading the qns but they had to announce that we were not to leave during the first half of and last ten mins of the paper.. so yeah i completed all my qns by 11.29 and waited a min till i was allowed to leave.. and yeah I LEFT . hahaha.. afterwhich we went to MS after much debate.. the guys are like super indecisive.. zzz ! and we watched the omen.. i cant rmb wad yx said during the movie but it was damn hilarious.. hahaah.. smth abt " WAD CB ENDING IS THIS" and " IM GONNA SCREW WEINI LATER, THAT BITCH !" hahaha and weini screamed a gazillion times.. mwaha.. darn scary la.. i had joyce's sweater over my head.. imagine hood of the sweater worn the other way ard.. hahahah ! and uhhh we went to the arcade as well.. bishi bashi-ed to vent all my friggin frustrations.. but its all over now.. cos its the hols ! but wait a min.. deres loadsa projects to complete.. darn ! =[ ohohoh.. today.. i was walking with joyce to the atm.. and she walked straight into some poster.. hahah rather cute la ! x) btw i think YX was high today and the funniest thing that happened was Hazel dancing to " too sexayy for my shirt".. LOL..

2006-06-04T06:11:00.000-07:00

EXAMS ARE TMR ! ive been studying pretty much & hopefully my effort pays off.. x) went studying with weini today but we got a lil sidetracked along the way cos SHE WASNT IN THE MOOD TO STUDY ! hahahahha.. i got my pay today & thats like damn cool la cos its very much needed.. mwaha... uhhhh.. i bought a lil something for everyone - everyone being those im close to [ that wud be weini, yuxuan, hazel, joyce, chicken and kevin ].. its nth much but its supposed to help destress.. so yeah . had dinner at jumbo seafood cos its my parent's 18th wedding anniversary and all.. food was pretty delish but the waitresses were weird . they kept kicking my chair and pretending nth happened.. like wtf?!?!?! but its okayy cos im nice . hahahah !

2006-06-03T07:11:00.000-07:00

hello ; met joyce and weini at like 2-ish before we went to NTUC and Macs.. along the way Joyce got hit by a rather peculiar women.. hahahha ! && studied today at weini's until she decided to PS us - me and joyce. we cooked soup at her house.. which tasted gd cos its like canned food to begin with.. LOL.. and uhh ransacked her fridge cos we found this poundcake that expired 5 years ago.. SERIOUSLY ! and joyce was like whoa.. and weini was like whoa.. and i was like whoa.. and we were like WHOA! hahaha.. & we studied at the library after that! was rather productive and all but there was another weird woman who was like damn weird la ! hahaha stayed at the library till 9 and joyce sorta followed that old lady home ! im pretty sure i had smth funny to blog abt but it slipped my mind.. oh wells.. x) BYE FOR NOW !

2006-05-29T08:15:00.000-07:00

mmms.. was black polo tee day today ! was rather funny and all.. took a retarded of everyone else attacking james.. poor gay boy.. x) other then that the day pretty much sucked.. its amazing how one person alone can spoil ur day.. i always thought that i have moved on.. apparently not. but still, that doesnt change the fact that YOU suck ... but thanks to Joyce who accompanied me to TM and all juz so that i would cheer up, i feel loads better now ! but as usual, i'll upload the picts another day... ahahaha.. btw the video of hazel's on my friendster profile.. loves it ! gotta go study now.. sigh . BYE !

2006-05-26T07:27:00.000-07:00

yoo-hoo ! lol.. that sounded retarded.. x) today was campus care network [ ccn ] day.. lessons ended at 12 ! but tirzah extended it for like 15 mins.. hahahha.. rather boring ! and as usual apel lessons only laster for half an hour.. its my fav lesson ! walked ard the stalls today and headed to tm for lunch at yoshinoya.. followed by a cab ride to joyce's.. she plays the electone damn well.. OMG ! i could have married her again... hahaha.. x) yes again ! we watched half of a pretty cool action flick.. and left afterward back to school.. mmms.. went for the BSGIG thingie.. & we initially thought it was a mistake.. we being hazel, me, weini, chicken and kevin.. hahaha.. so we left for tm AGAIN ! ate at pasta mania & james joined us... followed by arcade games but hazel left halfway.. and walked ard at toys r us.. when CHICKEN AND JAMES had the sudden urge to leave.. and WEINI gave some excuse and left too.. i wanted to kill her so bad.. hahahahha.. after that walked ard tm and century square and tm again cos we were waiting for joyce and yx but they nvr called so i left.. mmms.. met weini halfway thru walking home and we talked for close to an hour.. and now im online after bathing ! sounds boring eh? but it was rather fun.. x) ppl say that tk life beats life at tp but i think otherwise.. i was nvr really happy in tk anyway.. unlike now.. every moment of each dayat school's like an happy hour.. im lovin it !

2006-05-25T06:35:00.000-07:00

x) now for the blogging.. had ta write an article on teenage suicide - whose fault is it today... was rather dumb and i have this feeling i was outta point.. but w/e . don really care.. i have this sudden feeling that im gonna flunk csa cos it juz sucks.. they don test wad they teach in class.. so its like.. we're actually supposed to know a million redundant things abt computers.. how nice of the lecturer.. BOOs right at him.. hahahaha. uh.. i must add that some ppl juz suck . i wish they'd get a life and leave me out of their perverted nonsense.. they're pathetic and they don even know it.. how very sad.. oh well ! hahahah.. mmms.. after school ended was at the library.. where apparently was the highlight of today.. simply hilarious.. hahahah.. beyond description.. ppl do the weirdest things.. x) loves !

2006-05-25T06:08:00.000-07:00

Picts from mickey day ! hahahha.. there's an awesome video too.. cant upload it here unfortunately.. x)
my ah lian jie mei 184 [ just for laughs ] .

and xuan xuan ! the lil pervert..

followed by joyce ; the cute one

& last but not least, weini - who rocks .

& together, they're the best - ever .

2006-05-24T06:15:00.000-07:00

hey ! at the mortals reading this entry ! credits to the lovely joyce for the music and tagboard.. ahahahhs... today started off with a POM quiz which i screwed up considering my answers were pretty much diff from the two beside me - Hazel and Joyce.. Continued with a pathetic CSA lecture which i could have skipped to begin with.. whateverrr ! ahahahha.. uhhh.. kayaking after that ! it was pretty fun.. hahaha.. cos i hardly paddled anyway.. thanks to kevin - who also hit me accidentally with the stupid paddle! so yay and no yay on that, respectively.. den.. CHICKEN capsized our kayak.. LOL.. and while helping me back up, he hit me against the kayak.. so now my shoulder hurts in addition to the bite mark left by weini.. mmms.. so spent 2 hrs at the reservoir and went to bathe & eat at Kern-tucky's.. x) slept for like 2 hrs after that.. and was forced to have dinner.. zzz.. dad : i predicted that you couldnt finish your food.. as usual. the two sausages are already bigger den ur body.. LOL.. how mean... thats all ! im too tired to do a proper entry... so yeah.. byee !

2006-05-22T07:48:00.000-07:00

hello again ; im currently having this phase where i feel the urge and actually do take naps daily.. its getting irritating.. and some point in the day, my hearing juz bails on me.. lyk wth? hahahhaha... woke up at. 10.30 pm and had this rather interesting convo with my dad.. LOL.. dad: why are you up? me: huh i only slept for awhile.. dad: awhile? its 1am now ! u might as well not wake up.. me: *thinks to self before answering* i juz saw the clock.. its 10.30 -____- " hahahha ! school was not too shabby today.. had accounts quiz.. scored 9/10 but she din even record our marks... how intelligent.. mmms... we were taggin our joyce's blog during csa.. it was hilarious.. x) she's mine and hazel's and yx's .. go away . only applicable to a certain person.. mwahas.. uhms... tmr's mickey day.. so we're gonna wear mickey or cartoon tees.. picts tmr ! x) yayyy ! im looking forward to miss egghead - aka humpty dumpty.. hahha.. yeah right . who am i kidding ? DAMMIT.. i cant sign into msn.. for both comps... arghhhh . how nice . i absofrigginlutely love sarcasm.. dont you?

2006-05-20T06:42:00.000-07:00

MWAHA.. work sucked ! buttt.. i finally bought my swimming costume so yay on that.. got started on my comskills research todayy.. im preparing on teenage suicides.. hahahaha... saw a snippet of this cool article but unfortunately i dont have access to it.. DARN ! anyhow, i have like 20 pages of info already... should start picking on the important information.. it needs loadsa work cos its like too generalised and im supposed to concentrate on teenagers.. im kinda pressurised to do well cos its like the subj im most confident in and guess what? its not even graded - i think . urghhhh ! ohoh im staying over at weini's chalet.. x) cant wait ! and.. its surprising how some fags can avoid me and all as if im the one at fault & as if im dying to see them around.. I'LL DIE ALRIGHT ! and they go ard pretending that its some big secret.. you know what? you suck ! & ur only avoiding me cos of ur guilty conscience so take ur sorry ass and get outta here.. who needs you anyway.. hahahahahaha

my quote of the day ; by nicholas how :: so little ms carmen jacinthamanari kaur needs help

2006-05-16T05:40:00.000-07:00

Dear diary, today im gonna tell u a story abt some weird sad- ass teacher who ruined my day.. Firstly, i would like to begin with how her weird outlook appearance distracts me from the lesson.. imagine squinty eyes on a fair oval-round face with fringe at the sides.. its rather peculiar.. okay maybe not rather.. its very peculiar.. Secondly, she's damn bloody bitchy k ! she kept calling my name and went likt " carmen.... " it went on and on.. and she claimed that she wasnt targetting me but it was juz that i was assigned to do that question.. well.. THANKS ALOT.. i'll believe that in like a million years.. thirdly, she starting saying that she ever failed pupils for class participation.. good for her.. and she also added that if we talk she assumes that we know our work and all that naggy shit.. i somehow felt that was targetted at me cos she said that while gg thru my question.. how exciting.. the best part? i wasnt even friggin talking.. like wth is she talking abt? anyway no one likes her so w/e . im gonna study that subj damn hard to shut her up.. look down on me all u wanna.. but JUST YOU WAIT .

guess im pretty pissed off.. hahahah.. i was bitching abt it the whole damn day.. & was asked to chill many times.. i'll take a chill pill and throw it at her.. james said she was balding btw... hahahaha.. i think she heard it..

2006-05-15T06:46:00.000-07:00

they say a picture paints a thousand words, so im juz gonna post itty bitty pics here and there cos this is wad i've been up to lately.. MY BUNCHES OF FUN & LAUGHTER ! could i ask for more? dammit ; no . x)

& HI TO MY PRETTY SISTA; kevin LOL

2006-05-12T07:05:00.000-07:00

yayayay.. retarded stuff to blog abt todayy.. was my mummy's bdae yesterday.. dined at mezza9 at Grand Hyatt.. it rocked - totally ! the food was delishhh.. haha.. mmmms ! after that i was online till like uh 4am and 3 hrs later i had to wake up [ grudgingly ! ] to prepare for work.. as usual, it was nothing fantastic but the queue was pretty long and all so time passed pretty quickly.. went home for a quick bite which was actually only a cake & left for TP.. it rained buckets and i waited at the bus stop for joycey's parents to fetch me in.. hahha ! and while waiting some retarded ol' bus passed by and i got splashed with water like some kinda friggin tsunami effect.. tried to do our project on the fifth floor but the connection was shit.. so we were like wasting our time.. so w/e.. we went ta hazel's after that and the time spent there was much mroe productive ! even though we got really lame in the process of working on the project.. spent a gazillion years thinking of a group name but eventually we did ! & im glad to say that our work aint slipshod.. we put in loadsa effort even for a pathetic 2 marks ! x)

OHOH & i wanna thank JUI KERN for carrying my oh-so-dastardly-heavy laptop as well as loaning me his nano !!

2006-05-05T06:03:00.000-07:00

HAHAHAHA... im not going for e bowling trials anymore.. its like pointless, given my potential - which has gone on holiday... mmms.. my phone line was cut for like 2 days and it sucked.. thank goodness [ x a gazillion times ] that its fixed now.. yayness ! hahaha.. shopping rawked.. 2 tops from forever 21, 1 from topshop and 1 from hula & co.. made better with the company of joyce and weini as shown in the pics below.. hehs.. click for full pict ! x) im gonna have ta scrimp and save now ! ohohoh.. i absolutely dislike the comskills teacher.. damn bitchy la.. like wth? she stares at me like shes thinking :: omg, this girl's sucha whore.. thus i don like com skills.. yeah abso-friggin-lutely not - at all ! x)

to antor with love ;

2006-04-28T06:29:00.000-07:00

mmms.. things have pretty much changed since i last blogged.. which is like eons ago.. but w/e.. im pretty much enjoying myself right now.. my class [ 1b07 ] is bundles of fun.. x) esp the ppl i hang out with.. introductions? from the left yeah [ xuan xuan LOL , ME, hazel, joyceyy and james - extra eh? ] update soon ! x)

2006-04-11T10:22:00.000-07:00

nothing blog-worthy today.. uh.. woke up ard 11-ish to shop in town with Jh of cause.. bought 3 tops and spent alotta money.. dang, im broke.. oh i found something to gloat over.. LOL !

an icon a day.. they arent supposed to make any sense..

2006-04-10T07:56:00.000-07:00

2006-04-10T07:28:00.000-07:00

Another oh-so-boring day.. had work and all & went to the hair salon after for treatment.. it was darn EX! mmmMs.. not much to say though other than i was pissed off by like 99% of the customers...- thank goodness Huixian swopped shifts with me.. x)

Laters .

2006-04-08T09:41:00.000-07:00

mMmms.. alrighty a new blog.. shit happens but w/eva.. picts soon ! x)

-loves .